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I came into gaming during the late nineties, when the world of 3d platformers and FPS games were beginning to come into the spotlight. These were my games, and not the games that my uncles and cousins wouldn’t let me touch, nor were they the Halos and Jak’s of recent past. I am, of course, sifting through games released at any point in the last 30 years. 101 is a big number, you know.

Banjo-Kazooie is a pretty good game. There’s a lot of history behind it too, surpassing Super Mario 64 in the obscure trivia department. The game spent like five years in developmental hell, like many Rare games, and was scrapped and restarted at least once, going from a Legend of Zelda-type platformer to more of a cartoony Mario-type of game. The titular Banjo and Kazooie were upgraded from minor characters to starring roles. Project Dream, the original game, was lost to time[1].

The plot is marginally relevant. Banjo’s sister was kidnapped, possibly during the opening credit’s hoe-down, by Gruntilda, a witch whom was also a minor character from Project Dream. This leads to Banjo’s storming off through nine levels of varying degrees of frustration as he fights, flies, and farts his way back to his sister.  This culminates in a game show/board game, and pretty brutal final boss.

The difficulty curve on this game is not a curve in the least. It’s a steep drop at the halfway point.  You’ll plow through the first four worlds, but then the last five[2] will more than make up for it. The final battle with Gruntilda will cause you to throw your controller at least once.

One of the major flaws of this game, and many of the era, is that at many points of the game, it becomes a matter of you fighting the camera. I say this as though I’ve been keeping up with gaming advancements… I gave up on everything but JRPGs and DDR after 2002. I guess I’ll find out soon enough as I delve more into the Jak and Ratchet series.

Banjo-Kazooie is a game worthy of standing on the same platform as Super Mario 64[3]. It isn’t perfect, which SM64 is nigh close to, but there’s only so much stuff you can do with the same game before you have to play something different.
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Pokemon Platinum


So, each generation of Pokemon games has a third version, which is always released about a year later and has a ton of cooler features than the prior two. Normally, I don't bother buying these games, but when this game came out, I had expendable income, so I bought it.


The third game in each generation tends to attempt to have a plot. In Yellow, it tied in some elements of the anime. In Crystal, some guy that really wanted to yiff Suicune stole the plot. Emerald... I didn't pay much attention, but it basically made it so that both sides of Ruby and Sapphire were evil, and you were the neutral party. In Platinum, you follow the trail of a Zenigata-type character and a man that seems to be the closest Pokemon will get to a Sephiroth type.


This brings me to an aside. We all know that the majority of cartoons are 22 minute adverts. This is no less true in Japan. For example, Zoids is a toy lien that was big in the 90s or 80s or something. They were windup toy robots that you built yourself. It had a mild surge in popularity about 8 years back. They had three anime: Chaotic Century, New Century, and Fuzors. All three aired on Cartoon Network in some capacity. Fuzors was so bad that it was canned early on. It lost its grip on that balance that keeps a show like GI Joe or Transformers from wallowing in its Shilldom. Chaotic Century was the darker, Gundam-ish series, whereas New Century was the hot blooded, Pokemon-esque series. I bring this up, because no one I know liked Chaotic Century, and everyone remembers it. Inu-Yasha was the main character. I point this out, because this franchise did what Pokemon should do. Pokemon is a franchise where every product tries to get you to buy another product. You buy things in a circle. Gotta Catch em all.


The problem is that Pokemon is a children's game, and the anime is a show that has almost no serious plot. If you cater to the anime fans, then your plot can't be but so deep. This is very apparent when you play games in the third and fourth generations. Ruby and Sapphire's stories feature two organizations - Doomsday Cults bent on reviving their legendary pokemon to bring about a great flood or a great drought. "In order to expand the seas/land!" Gen 4 tops this the over-the-top "I want to end the world!" Big Bad. Really, it made me happy to be back in the first generations where a kid literally overthrows a criminal syndicate simply because they (literally) standing in his way. Really. If that guy had just stepped to the side to let Red enter the gym, Giovanni could've taken over the world. Silver's story in the sequel wasn't half bad either, a bad boy with daddy issues trying to find his dad and dismantle the remnants of his old man's gang. No, Cyrus is a fucking idiot. No fewer than three times in the game does someone tell him that unmaking the world as he plans would kill him too. Not only that, but his minions are idiots. The mooks in this game are unmatched in retardation*. "Boss wants to destroy the world... wait... I don't agree with that. But uh… I’m going to go ahead and follow him anyway."Or, his lieutenants, “Well, since this idiot is done trying to take over the world, let’s just go back to stealing stuff with all of our advanced technology.”


This brings me to a second aside.


The Pokemon games take place in what is an interpretation Japan. Its been mapped out. Characters and places have refered to other continents and countries in canon. Now, if you want to expand the seas, why do you want to cause a great flood? You already live on an island chain that's surrounded by ocean. Hell, if that's not secluded enough, why not just try to take over Hawaii or some island in the pacific. And, the idea with the drought is so stupid that I can't even begin. I'm pretty sure that's just going to bring about the apocalypse. Of course, it’s only natural that after trying to completely fuck up the planet, that the people of this world decide that they should try to mess with the deities that created the world.**



The game plays a lot like every other Pokemon game. I guess that goes without saying. The interface is only slightly improved. The graphics engine was changed in order to fix some glitches, and about eight new “formes” were introduced, meaning new movesets and making the aforementioned God Pokemon actually playable… because apparently they sucked in Diamond and Pearl. The characters have winter clothes, which is really just an excuse to see the heroine in another miniskirt. Postgame stuff was added, but that’s all a bunch of junk that cheats anyway.


* Let's just ignore the whole, "You're breaking into our secret base, so let's fight Pokemon instead of killing you," thing.

** I am still slightly bothered by the fact that I currently have enslaved all of the Gods of Pokemon.

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Bangkok Dangerous

I have no idea what this movie was about, and only watched it because I lost the remote. It was subtitled, true, but it didn't hold my attention. For example, I'm rereading the wikipedia entry on it, and don't remember half of what is posted there. In fact, I'm only counting this on my list because I did watch it. I just don't remember a lick of it, save for the meeting at a drugstore. Looking back, its like a movie where things just happen. Events occur, and then credits roll. Its not a bad method of story telling, but its like certain books I've been reading lately. There's a limit to where telling stories of almost mundane happenstance become dull. Yes, this was a movie about an assassin, and there was action, but I don't remember much of it.

Overall, I don't plan on adding it to my growing archive of films that I need to horde.

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On the wiki.

Released last August, as I recall, I finally finished the DLC chapters of Disgaea 3, which happens to make the game fall under my criteria for the goal. It must be a game that I haven't already completed. Its a good thing I stopped at just completing the story chapters, because the grinding means I probably won't be done with this game for a while. There are six DLC items that you earn by getting a high score. I might try to deal with that later.

The plot of the Disgaea series is relatively scant. The first and third games are the video game equivalent of slice-of-life anime, only not as boring. The second game has a plot, but its not very enjoyable, so no one really mentions it. Really, the side games are where he plot should remain, Phantom Brave and Soul Nomad are both very good games in that regard. The story focuses on Mao, the son of the Dean of Evil Academy, a Netherworld where the entire planet is a giant school for demons. Think of it like Bizarro World. The story is kicked off when Almaz, a nondescript human hero, arrives to slay Mao's father. Hilarity ensues. The plot isn't nearly as deep as the first game, which wasn't all that deep, and the second game feels like A Game of Thrones in comparison. If you've watched an anime, you know where the story will go at any given time.

The game plays like the first two, though its streamlined so that you can skip animations, check stats quickly, and get the camera situation worked out. Its amazing that it took five games to get those things right, but at least they did. Tactics are important up until you start grinding near the end, especially the post-game bosses. Fuck tactics at that point, you need a bigger sword.

The graphics are the same for the series, and have been a point of contention for retards. The PS3 is a powerful console, and the detail definitely went into the stages and complexity of some levels. The characters are still sprites, but I don't really mind that. I'll skip on graphics if the content is increased.

Also, its one of the few PSTriple exclusives.
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Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Its true, I hadn't seen it until yesterday. Like Seinfield, its so steeped into culture, that its not even so funny so much as required viewing to understand why 40% of jokes are funny. A similar phenomenon occurs with H.P. Lovecraft. The influence is all around you, and you don't notice it until you've seen the source.

Uhm, not much else to say.

I could nearly always predict when one of the memetic lines would burst forth. There were still moments that genuinely made me laugh from not having heard them before. The ending though, was like being trolled. Good job, 1975.
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"Now don't you feel bad for not paying to see it?"


The first movie I've seen since starting this list is Zombieland. Out last in October of 09, its the story of four survivors of the zombie apocalypse. Much like Left4Dead, the plot is pretty much set aside in favor of killing things and humor. Its a refreshing change from more hopeless zombie films, though there is a shallow hoplessness in the story, as we get to know the four heroes.

'The Rules' of Zombieland were probably my favorite part.

Good movie. Hopefully it doesn't get mired in a bunch of sequels though. I think this movie more or less did what it has to do. In an age of Sparkly Vampires and Torture porn, it shines through, and laughs at Scary Movie and other pieces of piss like that.

So, see it. If you haven't.
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Star Fox 64

Released originally on the Nintendo 64, in 1996. Rereleased on the Virtual Console.

This is the game that added "DO A BARREL ROLL" to the internet. And is the second most cited source of vidya furries turning to the fetish after Sonic the Hedgehog.

My brother was a gamer, I was the person that read the faqs to him so that he'd shut up and I could watch the game without having to play. Except water levels, I was always too afraid to watch those. Star Fox 64 is a classic now, which makes me feel very old. Two years ago, Zack, the part time shopkeep at the comic store was playing the VC for the first time ever. It was boggling to think that he didn't know how to unlock the secret paths, hard mode, and medals and stuff.

The game itself is a rail-shooter. You play as Fox, the head of a mercenary group, the titular Star Fox, to strike at the Tyrant Andross, whom is currently winning the war against Corneria. Somehow, four mercs are all that stands between Lylatt's survival and a giant monkey head. Well, there are dumber premises. WAY dumber. This one just skirts the line of plausibility. One of the hardest stages  (the hardest one) has the crew deciding that its a perfectly viable strategy for four men and a big honking mothership to punch through the most fortified area of the enemy's starfleet, thinking it the utmost stealth, seemingly forgetting that the last level was an ambush, and the level before that was a stealth mission that ended with them destroying a naval base. I dunno.

The mechanics are solid, as expected of something Miyamoto slapped his name on. There are moments that are difficult, the bosses can catch you off guard the first few times, but after a few tries, and some dexterity building, you learn to master a sort of button-mashing-riff.

The music is good, epic. Note that the first game had "The Saints Go Marching In" on the soundtrack, so there's a major improvement. Some characters (Slippy) could do with a mute. Its a shame his function is so useful, otherwise I'd kill him each mission just to cram a sock in it.

Multiplayer isn't half bad either, save the pain in the ass that is unlocking all the vehicles.

This is a must-play game. Its a staple of modern gaming, internet lore, and has held up decently enough after nearly 14 years. Trust me, like Sonic, nothing this series has done since this game is worth playing. This is as good as Star Fox gets before you start talking about Smash Bros.

RATING: 9/10
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Busy Busy, aren't I?

So, its been about three weeks, and I've learned lessons involving women, booze, friendship, several foreign languages, and that I may talk to myself more than I should.

Also that I never want to talk an Otaku girl again.

A growing time for all! Okay, the down and dirty:

8. Create a definitive bible for all of my works, in both book and wiki formats.

Construction goes well, thanks to wiki magic. Nowhere near done, of course.

9. Complete my Suite101 contract. [6/10] FAILED

For the best. I'll detail it later, but I don't plan on trying to rectify this one, simply because I have no time nor interest in grinding on that site.

14. Invent a complete conlang.

Construction goes good.  I have an alphabet and grammar structure. I just need to start making words, or something.

15. ‘Win’ NaNoWriMo.

November is a bad time for NaNoWriMo. I have next year to try again though. I'll detail this one later too.

19/20. Complete and Review 101 Games.

Just finished Star Fox 64, a game that has been out since 1996, but I have never finished. Expect the review to follow this.

21/22. Watch/Review 101 Movies.

Up to two here, Zombieland and Monty Python and the Holy Grail (which, I know you won't believe me, I honestly hadn't seen up until yesterday).

23. Learn to play Dungeons and Dragons

Done and done. I might as well make a post to commemorate something that I finished about a month ago...

December is upon us, and I plan to take another chunk out of this thing once finals end in a fortnight. Until then, nonreaders.

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So, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy is required reading for anyone in our line of society. The first five books of the trilogy were written by Douglas Adams, and ended on a down note that was a pretty heavy one for a largely comedic series. Adams was going to write a sixth book to end things on a slightly lighter note, but he died.

Eoin Colfer, author of the Artemus Fowl series, was commissioned to write it.

The story picks up where Mostly Harmless left off, and resumes irreverence from there.

Colfer's take on the series is probably what any fan of the series would've done given the chance. Things like the "Guide Note" asides were overdone, as were the alien references, but I can't say I wouldn't have done the same thing in his place. The story was a bit predictable, but that was kind of a relief, after reading Mostly Harmless, which was unpredictable and depressing. Mostly Harmless ended like every apocalyptic nightmare I've ever had ends.

Should you read it? Yeah. TV viewers are idiots; new things scare them and smart things make them feel stupid. The secret is to uphold the status quo at the very end. Colfer did that, and because he did, there's a sense of closure, though very much not a "The End."
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So, last week marked the end of this goal. It was A LOT MORE ANNOYING THAN I THOUGHT. 

I will admit though, going without candy for so long is a lot like going without sex for a long time. That first time afterward is explosive. The first thing I ate on the 17th was a box of nerds.

My teeth are still in bad shape though, so I haven't let loose with the candy gorging just yet. Chocolate is still completely out of the question.

I'm glad this one is out of the way, and that I might be able to maintain this goal after completing it.


Nov. 10th, 2009 05:53 pm
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I think that was the worst part of the semester. But it was the most fun, too. I had three exams in rapid succession. I have had this tab open on FireFox for three weeks now, it seems. I finally have a breather though, so before I put off studying to write, and then put that off to play Dragon Age, then put that off to take cold meds and stare off into space until morning, I'm going to update.





9. Complete my Suite101 contract. [3/10]
I asked for an extension, but then three of my articles got taken down. I'm going to write this one off. I'll finish the contract, but if I can just cancel between now and the 20th, that'll work. Hell, I don't even mind breaking the contract that much other than it fails entry.

14. Invent a complete conlang.

I wrote some stuff on this a while ago, but its still pretty basic.

15. ‘Win’ NaNoWriMo.

14,000 words in. I'm a day behind, but is a handy site to shore up the numbers. I'm going to aim for 6000 today, which means I'll probably only hit 3000.

23. Learn to play Dungeons and Dragons.

I just need to figure out 3.5 rules, and I'll be done here.

24. Build 101 Magic the Gathering decks.

I'm up to 53. They're all over the place. I'll have to do an inventory again this weekend.

40. Drop all candy from my diet for at least two months.


58. Obtain a Bachelor’s Degree.
59. Declare a second major and obtain that Bachelor’s as well.

2011 is the year, I think. I'm also going to be an English Major on top of being a Japanese one.

62. Attain conversational proficiency in German.

Hit a snag here. I have to drop German next semester to concentrate on both of my majors. I'll have to figure this out next time I get a breather.

81. Make Honor Roll every semester I have left of undergrad.


91. Put $1,001 into savings.
I signed up for a thing on campus that paid me for stuff. Most of the money I got from that went here. This money is also being designated my personal escape money, in case I need to, well, make an escape.
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Getting harder to do this every week, so I might do it every other. Anyway! Time for the rundown!

#9. Complete my
Suite101 contract.

Submitted Article #3, with #4, #5, and probably #6 to come this week, if not before I go to bed tonight. I have little less than a month to finish up. I don't know if I'll renew though. The site isn't my bag.

#23. Learn to play Dungeons and Dragons.

I DM'd this week. I have a few more things to work out, and I'll have 4.0 down. Then I'll learn 3.5, and then consider this son-bitch DONE.

24. Build 101 Magic the Gathering decks. [51/101]

Couldn't tell you which ones are which, but I counted 50, and built 51 Friday.

25. Win a major M:TG tournament.

Went to the SCG 5k in Philly last weekend. I went 2-4DROP, as did Paul and Steve. A bad start for a lofty goal, but I haven't played competitively in a few years. I hope I'll get back in the swing. 

29. Listen to every song on my iPod at least once. [~8 days remain]

I fixed the Smart Playlist that I was using for this. I set it to ignore the podcasts and audiobooks, because it was getting annoying. They'll get their own lists later, though technically, neither the audiobooks nor podcasts are truly songs, so screw them.

40. Drop all candy from my diet for at least two months. [1/2]

I made sure this didn't say consecutive last night, then I ate some candy after 5 weeks last night. I'm back off the junk again, and on Nov 17th, this'll be done, and I might give up candy for good. Probably not. This was hard.

91. Put $1,001 into savings. [$19/$1,001]

I accidentally spent the seven bucks I had here. I've since replaced it, as you see. This will be my secret savings.

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Ah, another week, inches closer. Been sick. Been angry. Been depressed about implications.

But, onward we go.

I have to write the update up tomorrow. I have a German composition to write, and then an article to post. And need to make a snack run.
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A Matter of Minutes

Again she yells at me for making us late. Late is situational. But no matter how you spin it, today nothing I have done has resulted in us being late. This girl, the girl I love, is scowling. I match her scowl with my own, and the feeling is not entirely false. We will reach our destination, and we will reach it more than thirty minutes early. However, because of a slight hesitation, it is as though I have held up our expedition months from our target.

I sigh yet again, and let pass last week, where she cursed my existence for making her a few minutes early. We arrived at the same time we always do. A friend once told me, you do not argue with someone who thinks they’re right, because in effect they are. Logical and illogical do not matter in a screaming contest.

“If you had just been outside” she rebukes, “on the porch, all packed, door locked, ready to jump in, this wouldn’t happen.” She would have me wait on the highway as well, and jump in to her car as she cruised past.

“How much time would that save?” I retort, every time. Every time, my face is deadpan.

“That’s not the point. I already have to go out of my way to pick you up, the least you can do is be ready.”

I try to point out that I was ready; that by her definition of ‘out of the way’, for me to be ‘on’ her way, I would have to live on a northbound median strip. My words are dry leaves caught in a frigid November wind. Try as they might to reach the stone, they can’t even reach it. They end up in a gutter, cast aside with the other thoughts, arguments and confessions. Feelings that are unwanted, and unseen, by the rushed girl I love, as she barrels down the highway at a brisk 50 MPH. I look at the clock and hold back the words that would cause those dead leaves to spark up like kindling. Even if we were to be late, I’m the one who suffers.

“You’re looking at a problem of hours, but you’re thinking in seconds,” I say, rolling the window up and looking to the stack of books in my lap. I leave it at that, hoping she’ll puzzle out the meaning after I am out of her car.

When I get out of the vehicle, I fear that she does get the implication. I fear that when she does, this girl I love will finally stop going out of her way.

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#90. Spend a weekend in 10 different US cities.

So last week was Nashville... 

My main reason for going was the Protomen Act II release show. I left Maryland Thursday evening, after going to class, checking on my bike's status, and accidentally pissing away a few too many hours playing Magic with the BKs ('Bad Kids') at PG. I only remembered that this was part of my list when I got to the Airport. Due to Reagan's layout, I ended up going through security twice. Delta also, in the time between booking my flight and actually getting on, outsourced my flight to Northwest, which meant my nonstop flight wasn't anymore. I ended up going to DETROIT for a stopover. I kind of hate the airlines for that.

 Anyway, on the flight out of DC, I looked out and saw the bridge, and then I saw the Gaylord nearby. I thought to myself, "One of these days, I'm going to take off and it'll be the last time I see those things." Then I wondered if anyone got fired in the past two weeks. According to the payroll book I snuck a peek at today, no one. Take off is my least favorite part of flying. Though I'm not fond of landing... or any other part of the experience either. The second flight out of Detroit was much nicer, which was the case when I went to Vegas as well. When I reach Nashville, I realize that my next excursion is definitely going to be a road trip. The rest of the weekend cemented that decision.

 My hotel was a bad one. A hole in the wall if there ever was one. The tub's stopper was broken, someone had been doing plumbing work on the sink, the bathroom door had a hole punched through it, and every room in the hotel was too big for the doorway to close properly, so that meant at any given time of the day there was someone slamming a door shut. On the plus side, there was a Steak'n'Shake next door, which is a nigh-24-hour burger place that sell burgers for roughly $2 less than  any fast food place nearby. Yes, I accounted for price differences, I ate a McDonalds on day, and it was the same price as at home. I ate at Steak'nShake for nearly every meal that I wasn't in the city.

 Friday I attempted to take a bus into Nashville, for I was far indeed from it, thank you deceptive maps. However, it would appear that the bus stops in Antioch Tennessee are purely for show. I ended up waiting an hour for the bus, and when it didn't arrive, had to take another cab. Another dagger in my side. I don't think I've mentioned this enough anywhere online, but I loathe cabs. The show itself was awesome. Unfortunately, the front of the stage became a mosh pit, and the club was a little smaller than the 9:30 club, and was backed. I found a spot by the string players, and steered clear of the din. After the third set though, I was too beat to actually listen to the end of the second album, so I sat out on the balcony with the opening act, The Non-Commissioned Officers. I wasn't the only one that came out far to see the show, there were people from the Carolinas, New York, the surrounding Bible Belt, and a loud and rather obnoxious contingent from Wisconsin.

Saturday was spent wandering Nashville Proper... and then drinking in the one non-country themed bar in the area. I got hammered. I don't know if it was more than normal though. I was by myself, so my ability to measure things like that was off. The place I had dinner at wanted to call me a cab, but I decided to get one myself. Curiously, I find it harder to speak in one language after drinking. Nothing cool like forgetting how to speak English completely, but the smaller words and statements seem to be set to shuffle.

 Sunday I just made sure to get money for a cab and to get to the airport. By Sunday I think I'd seen enough of Nashville to last me for a few decades. Stan, the cab who'd given me his card, and was the only American cabby I'd gotten the whole time, had said he'd arranged for someone to get me, but I, as per the norm, miscalculated the timing of my flight, and had to leave about an hour earlier. Ignoring calls is something I don't like to do, but he'll survive. It would've only been a problem if I had missed the plane. The flight out sucked. SUCKED. SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKED. The plane was tiny and crowded. Small planes do not instill confidence in me. I'm a microphile, but this time that didn't work for me. I was glad to be off of that flight. The second flight was better, though it was delayed a few minutes.

All in all, good show, bad hotel, decent bar, shit flights.

Nashville down.

I think I'm going to Philly next week. If I get to see enough scenery outside of my CARD GAMAN, then I'll count it.
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Sorry I didn't update last week, but between the flights and concerts and drinking, I couldn't be tasked with updating two blogs.

At least, not while drunk.

Here's the rundown.

#90. Spent last weekend in Nashville. More on that trip later.
#91. Put $7 into savings.

I haven't kept up on numbering my writings or decks, so those stats are probably much higher, pending a count. Next month I hope to take a bite out of my writing quotas, what with NaNoWriMo around the corner and all.

I need to make this look cooler.
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List updated.

#9. I submitted my second article to Suite101.
#24. Built at least 3 new Magic decks. Going to get a count on them after I post this.
#28. Songs added to my iPod include: The Dethalbum's secret disc, The Dethalbum II, Good Omens, a mood album, and a podcast that I'm probably going to not count towards my end goal. I'm not oging to count podcasts and videos towards maxing it out, because I honestly don't think I'd ever listen to them more than once.
#29. Podcasts do count here, unforunately. I have 20 days worth of listening to get through. Plenty more, given this can't be completed until #28 is.
#37. Cowered out of donating blood this week.
#40. Almost at a week on the no candy thing. I'm going to cut soda out this week. That's not on my list, but I might as well.
#90. Going to Nashville this coming weekend. Currently lookig up what to 'do' in Nashville other than the concert I wanted to go to.


Sep. 20th, 2009 02:09 am
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Wrote one Flash story. "An Awful Undertaking." Outlining the Prologue for another book.

Added ~3 gigs to iPod, Maximum the Hormone's discography, among others, including "The Best of MTV Unplugged," and some kind of Led Zepplin cover album. I have about 18 days worth of music to listen to, not counting the podcasts, audiobooks, and stuff I did listen to but iTunes didn't count.

First article was published one Suite 101. Nine more to go. I don't know how much time is left in my contract, but I'm going to finish article two today and submit it and begin number three.

Assembled six new Magic Decks, but scrapped one. Apparently, one of my decks was a Pokemon deck, which doesn't count toward my goal. :-/

Put $7 into the secret savings box.

I tried to give up soda, but failed after a few hours.

I've given up candy for about six days now. It is harder than I thought. My self-restraint these past few...uh, decades... has been pretty bad. I think once I can pass on candy, then I'll add soda into the mix, then fast food, and then I might go as far as to eliminate most of the sugar from my diet. I found a Starburst in my bookbag while studying, and started unwrapping it without thinking. I was pressing it to my lips when I remembered that I wasn't supposed to be eating it. It was orange flavor, which is a crap flavor, so it wasn't that hard.

I took my picture for about three days, but forgot after the fourth. I'm going to have to have a reminder set up to remember to keep doing that.
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Elements are coming together for my next big writing dealy.

Using Lovecraftian elements is a hard thing to do, because only the man himself can write the way he did. Anyone else comes off as parody. In order to do it right, you have to look at the mythos from your own perspective.

So, that's what I'm going to try and do. Plus it let's me do more world building. I put this off because I didn't have the Lovecraftian levels of fatalism in me at the time. However, if I come at it from a different view, one I can't quite put into words, it'll feel more genuine to me.

So for now, I have characters and outlines drawn up, and I'm spending time talking to myself in my head, trying to get an idea of how these characters should act.

Expect a weekly list update thing when I get back from wandering.
breaking_changing: (Default)

An Awful Undertaking 


I couldn’t be sympathetic in this.

                “I don’t want to, and I can’t believe I have to rush home in traffic to go to a damn church.”

Then why are you going? I want to ask. Why are you still doing any of this? I want to yell that. But I sigh and stroke my chin instead. I look at the mirror outside the window, then at the road zooming underneath us. I fidget in my seat and try to look anywhere but at the steering wheel. Anywhere but her hands. Anywhere but her finger, with its fly-sized, tumorou,s rock banded around it. Always my eyes return to it.

                I had heard every doubt, fear, apprehension and uncertainty. And I had listened and feigned interest.   School and work was one thing; those I can empathize with. But as she sat there, whining about her troublesome engagement to the passionless rich kid, my ears were closed and my heart was cold. The pretense of apathy was the most I could do for this girl, the girl that I love. Then why did you say yes? I mouth the words. Every day I mouth those words, hoping to scream them at her, as though giving them to her were some great imperative. But I can never manage to utter them.

                I take a deep breath, and mess with my cellphone. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see her frowning at me. The words sink back into my bowels again.


breaking_changing: (Default)
Kelil Stephanos

April 2010

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